A few days before Christmas Kid1 told us they had a “painful lump” on the side of their head, just behind their ear. We checked, and sure enough, there was a lump. It was late in the evening, and there were no other complaints, so we tried to take a picture of it, emailed the pediatrician, and my lizard brain kicked into overdrive with worry.

Cancer. An abscess. Some sort of tumor. A mysterious head injury. Lizard brain churned out dozens of scenarios, none of which ended well.

The pediatrician emailed back with a list of symptoms to keep an eye out for. Fever. Swelling. If it grows larger or changes size. If it bothers them more, call urgent care and bring them in. 

We diligently checked. No fever. No changes. After a day or two of diligent checks and no changes, Kid1 snapped at me “it wasn’t bothering me until you asked!”

As things obviously trended better, there was a follow-up message with the pediatrician. It was mostly likely a swollen lymph node, and it resolved on its own.

Eventually when asked Kid1 just gave us the classic teenage side-eye and waved us from their room. They’re fine, now go away.

Kids these days.

If we’d still been in Christian Science, we would have worked diligently to “correct our thought.” We would have sat with “the books” for hours and likely called a Christian Science Practitioner to help. They would have lectured at Kid1 for not having read the weekly lesson or being too prideful or acknowledging the material state (or whatever transgression causes painful lumps to manifest on the side of one’s head), and reiterated the unreality of matter, the falseness of the pain, the folly of erroneous thought.

We would have hailed this as an amazing healing, and possibly have given a testimony. I’m not sure what we would have claimed to have “healed” Kid1 of, but it wouldn’t have been anything as mild as a swollen lymph node that resolved naturally on its own.

But we’re not still in Christian Science, and even though lizard brain did terrible things to a night of sleep until logic and the pediatrician put my thoughts at ease, at no point did I feel my thoughts or understanding (or lack there of) of Christian Science were to blame for Kid1’s situation.

And if anything had changed or gotten worse, yes, lizard brain would probably have had a field day with anxiety, but we also would have taken Kid1 in to see their pediatrician and followed up as appropriate. I’m so very glad we can email the pediatrician’s office, they’re so much nicer than the CSPs I worked with ever were.